This post was first published in UKEdChat Magazine and is reproduced here with kind permission.
As educators, we’re all aware that it’s not enough simply to fill our pupils with knowledge and hope for the best. In order for them to enjoy and achieve both within and beyond school, they need both healthy self-esteem and self-confidence, something that is often sadly lacking as illustrated by these pupils.
“I know what I want to look like, but however much I work out I never look that way. It makes me feel like a failure.” (Year 10 boy)
“You’re constantly judged for how you look and I don’t look how you should.” (Year 9 girl)
“If I was thin I’d be happy.” (Year 11 girl)
“I never feel good enough at anything. I’m just a bit of a failure really.” (Year 8 boy)
The good news is that, as educators, we’re in a great position to support pupils in tackling these thoughts and feelings to develop a more positive outlook. If you’re thinking of incorporating body confidence and self-esteem as part of your PSHE curriculum, here are some key pointers to bear in mind:
1. Start with you
Our pupils always remember far more of what we do than what we say or teach. When we teach them one thing but do another we send mixed messages and the lesson is unlikely to get through. Teaching adolescents to be accepting of their changing bodies is more effective if we’re able to embrace rather than bemoan our greying hair or middle aged spread. If you’re not quite ready to declare your love of your bingo wings, at least try to keep quiet about your misgivings within the earshot of pupils!
2. Don’t forget boys
Issues around body image and self-confidence are often considered to be ‘girl problems’ but they affect boys too. Increasingly boys are taking a keen interest in their appearance and feel that others are placing value judgements on them based on how they look. They’re less likely than girls to feel comfortable discussing these issues so it’s important that we help them develop the confidence and skills to do so.
3. Promote open discussion
Creating an environment where pupils can openly and honestly explore their experiences is an effective way to break down stigma and prejudice. It also enables us to explore misconceptions held by pupils, staff and the wider community as well as being conducive to problem solving and help seeking. You’ll need to explore appropriate ground rules with pupils in order to keep them safe, and signpost relevant sources of support as a part of this type of discussion.
4. Pay better compliments
Working together as a school to reduce the emphasis placed on looks and appearance can be hugely beneficial. Listen out in the staffroom for the compliments you hear, they’re almost always entirely superficial based on clothing or appearance so it’s no wonder that we all place value judgements on ourselves based on how we look. Try instead paying more meaningful compliments – and teach your pupils to do the same. Think about celebrating effort rather than attainment and character rather than appearance. Giving specific, relevant and heartfelt compliments is affirming for both the giver and receiver – why not give it a try?
5. Think outside the box
When teaching about issues like body confidence, try to help students understand how relevant it is to their own lives and encourage a broader conversation. For example, in teaching about airbrushing as part of a lesson with a media literacy focus, we might think first about airbrushing of models in magazines, before thinking about the process we go through when sharing images on social media – selecting one from a number of pictures, perhaps enhancing it with an app… and then you could take this even further and discuss how people often ‘airbrush’ their lives before sharing them on social media, meaning that we can often feel every else is living the perfect life and we’re lagging behind.
Like many educators you may feel anxious teaching about topics like body confidence and self-esteem, partly due to your personal insecurities and partly due to the fact it’s a topic you’ve probably never been trained in, but I hope that the ideas here will help to improve your confidence in tackling this important topic. There are some great resources available too – the newly updated Dove Self-Esteem Resources have recently received the PSHE Association’s quality mark and contain everything you need to teach a lesson on body confidence. You can download them for free, or you can have a free workshop delivered to your students by a Dove facilitator which can be a great learning opportunity both for your pupils and for you!
Author: Dr Pooky Knightsmith is the mental health and emotional wellbeing advisor for the PSHE Association, in this role she recently quality assured the Dove self-esteem project resources. Pooky is also an expert member of the Campaign for Body Confidence Group and author of the Eating Disorders Pocketbook for Teachers.
You might also be interested in:
Blog Post – 6 Activities to Improve Students’ Self-Esteem