Self-Care for Those Who Care

When you're caring for a child with mental health difficulties or additional needs, your own needs slide down the list until there's nothing left to give. Looking after yourself can feel selfish. But your child learns how to treat themselves partly by watching you, and it's much easier to be patient when you're not running on empty.

The ideas here fit into a busy day. There's a slow breathing pattern, in for four and out for eight, for the moment you feel your temper going. You'll write a "to don't" list of jobs and standards you can drop, and find people, in a support group or online, who understand what your days are like. When you're being hard on yourself, you'll learn to ask what a good friend would say.

There's time, too, to think about who you are outside caring, and the friends and interests that got pushed aside.